Sunday, December 10, 2006


#1) I have never seen any of the Rocky films. (Sorry Kat)

#2) When you are sad....I am sad. (what's that about)

#3) I like it better when my brother is in jail.(I worry less)

#4) I prefer people who are Quarkie. (business is boring)

#5) I want to audition for American Idol. (Don't say "do it")

#6) I have absolutley NO desire to EVER be married.

#7) I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener

The End

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

A great new look

Reyna wore a new hat today.
It looked like unto a jesture hat. On the ends it has little pom poms.
Eleni walks up, gives the ends a light tug so that the top is flat, and say "there. Now you look like a pinata."


Wednesday, November 15, 2006

It starts...

Cold and flu season has begun. I was down four kids yesterday and the ones that were there were having a "cough Olympics." Beware gang the stories are about to get better.
Think of it 15 kids. 1 class room. 2 teachers. the possiblities are endless.

Monday, November 06, 2006

A Horse Of A Different Color

Saturday I was at the mall with my bosses kids. (she was out of town and I stayed with her kids.) And were playing with those grab machines trying to win a toy from the game. ( I never win these things.) And that's what I thought in my head. "I Never Win These Things."
Suddenly there was a voice in my head. It wasn't mine. It was Meggie's! (one of my massage instructors.)
It was the old "Possitive Affermation. Will it to happen" lecture. (Yea, loud and clear!)

So I tried it. An "experiment on the word" if you will.

I said. "I'm going to win this." (it was a Care Bear) So I thought "I'll give it to Meggie to give to Maddie after I win it." (Maddie is her daughter.)

I Got it in one shot.

It was so COOL!


I told Shannon "Dude you have to try this." I gave her two quarters and SHE GOT IT.

I thought "This is Amazing!!!"

"Matt. Come 'ere. Take these two quarters and try to get something from the grab machine. Believe you'll get it. Don't doubt it." HE GOT IT!

It was the coolest thing ever!

From there the day just kept getting better. Mostly durring my clinic shift. I had 5 AMAZING Bodywork sessions. And I got Fab. evaluations from all of my clients. One of them a staff member who gets worked on allthe time. And another who has been coming to the clinc for the past 10 years and said that in "about 250 Massages" i was among his top five.
It was s o cool cause all of my clients were like "Dude you are going to be able to work anywhere you want. Your amazing"
I could go into way more detail but its too long.
Totally a Supper Awesome Amazing Day!!!!!


Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Your mom Called.....

It's Halloween. I'm fat. and I'm comin' ta get ya.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

the kids speaks out

This week one of my kids ran up to me and gave me a hug then she said "Teacher Lisa your skinny.....Kinda"


Friday, September 08, 2006


Arora: Teacher Lisa I'm fast!

Me: Who said you could be so fast?

Arora: My dad.

Me: Is your dad fast?

Arora: No. He's fat.

I challenge Anyone to beat that. She's only four. And she's already getting the hang of slammin' her parents. It was a proud day for me.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006


Why is is that these people are so capable of bringing you to the brink of your sanity? Truely we care for them. Only those we let in are capable of this drive. We were raised together (to a point) and we feel we know them. Sometimes it's easier to be disapointed in them because we expect more from them. They should "know better" or something like that. We see what they CAN be. And we want that for them. And when they fall short of that, are we not more disapointed then we would be if it were just another somebody?
I'm not saying we are the perfect siblings either. We must be disapointing to them too. Otherwise they would call more. Or something. Rihgt?

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Cute little guy

JACOB(4 yrs old.): Teacher Kerri you look pretty today. You look like Lisa, but your Kerri.

He is of course my new best friend!

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Dog eat dog world

No for real gang do we really need to have people in this world who dress up thier dogs? Does the dog really need that experience? Come on folks! What are we doing?

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

job searching

I know I want a new job.
I know I'm more then done with child care.
I know I don't really want to go back into customer service.
But gang I've never done anything else. My typing "skills" are laughable.
But I need to make more $$ then I do at the day care.

Is there a dream job out there that will pay more $'s per hour. that I can do well and be happy doing? And hopefully only have to work 30 hours a week so that I can keep up with school. Oh and can it be close to provo or easy to get to by bus because I don't have a car?
Where is the Oprah Fairy when I need her?

Friday, July 28, 2006

a complex man

Today i rode the bus to school as usual. I went early for a study session before my final. ( I got an A on the final. barely) I had a different driver then normal.
This dude was crazy! Every time a woman got on the bus he was very nice and smiled all the normal things a bus driver should be. Every time a man got the bus he either tried to leave them, tell them they didn't have enough money or (my personal favorite)try to run them over. There was a man and his 10 yr old son getting thier bikes off of the front bike rack and he kept reving the engine at them! I was thinking "Dude. What's your damage. They aren't waisting time. Chill out!"
He was so odd.

Sometimes I wonder what leads a person to a job. And what keeps them there. (Kinda like my job right now.)

Anyhow the guy was a freak and I many more are there?

Monday, July 24, 2006

Sean Patrick Sparks

Today my kids were out on the playground. As usual. Playing and making up there own fun, when I over heard my little Sean:
My name is Sean Patrick Sparks. Someday. When I'm a man. My name will be Captain. Jack. Sparrow.
Then He tilted one eyebrow at the girl he was talking to as if to say "Ya see I've already got a pirate eye."

Sunday, July 23, 2006

could i see that again

okay don't be scared wheen i tell you i have a new hobbie. ive been playing in the bars as of late. doing some people watching and dancing my size 8 bum into a size 6. good times.
last night while shakin it at the big easy a guy was tryng to pick up on my friend lisa.
basicly the pick up line was something like
i saw you and your friend last night. but i wasnt sure it was you until your friend [me] turned round and i recognized dunk a dunk.

that's right people my toosh can be pulled from a line up.
there were a lot of bums in that place last night. and mine stood out above the crowd.
way to go. i wonder what am i going to do with all that junk up in my trunk.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

somebody call 911

Last Saturday i was awakened by the sound of my cell phone ringing at 7 in the morning. it was a 911 operator.
O:Are you okay ma'am?
Me: huh?
O: This is 911. we got a call from this number. are you okay?
...long story short i some how rolled over my phone while slepping an dialed 911 and left them with an open line for about 12 minutes.
My bad 911. My Bad.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

been a while?

so as many of you know the internet in out apt. has been down. but hey all is we for we have returned.
whats new?
whats new...
whats new?
I got nothin' I'm still loving school and getting lots of clients to practice on. I love the work and i love the education.
I can't wait till I have a licence and can make money at this. get it while its free kids!
I could use a new job though. I love my little kids but it's time for teacher Lisa to make money and pay her bills with out stress.
next Sat. is the childrens parade in provo. I'm clowing the event. ya'll come see. I'm funny.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

it's a bird! it's a plane...

the other day while on the playground with my little pre schoolers, we were attacked by the mother of all things that fly. "attackd" in the sence that this large circling creature swooped and dove numerous times. Trying its best to intimidate we two legged beings below. i don't know what her intensions were. She was carring something, probably left overs from one of her previous attacks. this gi-huge-ic monster continued her efforts for a few minutes. I got a good look at her....this was no bird. nor was she a plane. it was a mutant of a queen bee. Her size and wing span impressive. i most certaiinly wanted no contact with her and i was greaful when she finally flew away. goodness knows i didn't want to look like a giant pansey. i most definattely did not welcome the opportunity to fight this worthy apponate. mostly cause i would have lost....she was bigger then me.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Mana from heven

yesterday ii got pooped on by some jacked up bird. not so much a plus.
that is all.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

yea buddy

today is a good day. I'll tll you why.
I hav clarity for my future.
My brothers are doing well.
Ma is healthy and winning.
I'm in school. and makin' the grade.
I have good friends.
I'm leaving my job for something better.
Jay is almost done with season 5.
Brian is going to days.
I get to have massage twice this week.
I haven't been in a mens room in over 24 Hours.
yea. life is good.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Party in the Potty

Today I walked into a mens room.
I was confused.
It was pink.
Then I saw the urinals.
Then I realized where I was.
Then I laughed out loud.

Dudes of the world. I know your secret.

Monday, May 01, 2006

'Oint learly taken"

So there was this one time (last week) were I sent a semi formal email to a teacher friiend of mine. and I made the miiistake of typing on Namaaaaa's lap top. (theeee keys stiick)
she didn't answer back untiillll tooday.
I figuered out wy.
she couldn't read tthe thing.
With phraases like "oint learly taken." who could blame her. Poor kid probably things I'm some kind of nut job.

Point Clearly Taken.

I mean.........Got iit
Nope.......Got it.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Here let me get that for you

Today I was run over by a woman pushing a shopping cart in Wal mart. Nothing as tramatic as Em's broken leg story. But I tell you what, that is going to be one big ol' bruise on my hip. Then as if that were not enough I cut my hand on a shelf while trying to get to some soup. Oy the things I go through for that preschool.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

I love that you get me

I fall down.
A Lot.
I fall down, I get hurt, it usually ends in tears.
I'm clumsey.
I try to stay up. Balanced. Normal.
I fall down harder.
It's not good.

I am however a little proud of it. Only in the fact that I haven't died yet. No Major injuries needing surgery or large scale correctoins. Stuff like that.

And now I have a comrad. A fellow accident prone pal that is not ashamed of her falling...ness.

Bless you my friend. Bless you.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Ais (ace)

A couple days ago Ais (that's what I call her) was playing on the playground. She and another girl were yelling at a bird.
"Come on Bird. Come on Bird. What you got. Come on Bird."
Really yelling at this Bird to
"Bring it. Bird."

just then the bird swooped down past them and they screamed and ducked and

did it over and over and over. they AND the bird.
I was thoroghly amused.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Jordin my tiger

today i was playing with one of my tiger boys. we were havng a tickle war. it was all kinds of fun. he was wiinning.....I was winning......then he was winning.
I was winning...then my little guy says "Teacher Lisa stop. I'm gunna tell your husband."
so I said "when you find him tell him to call me."

not really. Just like Angelica...I had no response to that.

Thursday, April 13, 2006


Today I saw JO. He's 8. He was walking down the street. By himself. alone. eight.
I was driving the big A.T. van. I dropped off the kids and my partner teacher at A.T.
Then I ran down the street to meet up with little JO.
The Gist of it:
Me: Hey Little JO. What are you doing? Where are you going? Where are your Four older syblings or mom or grandma or whoever was supposed to pick you up?
JO: Well I can't find them so I'm walking home.
Me: Where do you live?
JO: BFE that way.
Me: well how about we go to A.T. and call grandma to come get you?
JO: okay
15 min later
Angery man who was supposed to be picking up the boy arrives at AT dirty looks at boy and ready to do some hollerin'
grandma arrives 26 sec. after angery man.
then they all go out the door
grandma: Thank you Lisa
Me: No problem G'ma just glad he's safe.
Grandma: me too.
Angery man: (scowle)

I don't have point or a moral but wow what a day huh?

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Eat the burned Part...'s good for your teeth.

that is what my ma used to say to me when I was young.

I grew up. I stopped eating the burned part.

I went to the dentist yesterday.

Mom was right. DONT ask me how. but I need 4 fillings a root canal and an entire tooth REMOVED. And then some odds and ends.

I'm.....................gunna go burn a pizza.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Pressure Much...?

I was involvd in an accident today. some lady hit my bumper as i was driving the big Advnture Time van. it was all fast. no one was hurt, but dude ya wanna talk pressure. Drive a van with 10 kids that belong to 10 different sets of parents. Parents who might well be very angery with you if you were to say.....get into an accident with their child in your ride. And then you will understand PRESSURE.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

in response to Em

5 movies you can watch over and over
1) anything geared towards children
2) Steel Magnolias
3) Raising Helen
4) joe Versus the volcano
5) hello dolly

5 embarrassing songs you know all the words to:
1) anything by Reba McEntire
2) ice ice baby - Vanilla Ice
3) Baby got back - ?????
4) hail holy queen - sister act nuns
5) in pictures - Linda Davis

5 Memorable halloween costumes:
1) Raggity Ann - ??
2) a missionary - 21
3) Belle - 26
4) a doctor - ??
5) a garbage can - ??

5 celebraties you sespect to be alien:
1) the entire cast of Gilmore Girls
2) Steve Bushemy
3) Molly Shannon
4) Jackie Chan
5) David Duchovney

5 occupations you know you could not have:
1) Plumber. - I'm against crack in public
2) Politian. - I don't even like thinking about the future
3) Reporter. - I don't like the news
4) poet. - I can't ryme
5) Lawyer. - i can't spell big words

5 books I have recently read outside of school:
1) Frog and toad are friends
2) the magicians nephew
3) No David
4) Wicked
5) an idiot girls christmas

5 ways to spend a perfect afternoon
1) hiking
2) playin softball with friends
3) rollerbladding with my boys
4) watching a long movie
5) hanging out at the pool

5 Lines you have blatenly stolen from a movie, TV, commercials, etc.:
1) "if she doesn't back off I'm gunna spike her Tab with Draino" -Adventues in Babysitting
2) "come here ya big bald beautiful man" -X Files
3) "he's got the heart of a champian" -Homestar Runner
4) "Pickle claw...Toliet paper claw..." -Ellen
5) "oh Honey. No" -Will and Grace

5 not your favorite foods but foods you eat:
1) Veggies
2) skittles
3) frozen pizza's
4) pudding
5) Candy

5 People that must respond ASAP:
2)I know
3)is already

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Weekend times

for two consecutive weeks i've had awesome weekends. It's been so great.
Last weekend on Fridayafter work a buch of us from the preschool went to dinner at Sweets. (awesome food) ate for hours tried some new food. it was great after that three of us drove up to SLC to Chicken out of going clubbing. yea we got all the way to SLC and the brave one chickened out. LAME.
Saturday rocked...we went to an awsome villa dance party. oh good times. The Chad can thow a mean party Aye, folks.
Sunday I went to my new ward with Em. Sweet!! I like it there.

This weekend was the same kind of good times. Friday night we went to dinner at an Elsalvadorian resturant. SO GOOD. Then we went to a Villa bash and chased Pulse the leperchan. It rocked!
Saturday I ran all over town makin' a movie with Jay. Came home and got ready to go to the Harry Krishna Bash. I got color splashed and caught on fire. It was totally wicked!!
Sunday did the new ward thing and finished my first week of homework. And now Jay and I are putting the finishing touches on the film.
Life is good when it's bussy.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

dirty ball

I was playing basketball with my boys at outside time. they like to play "dirty ball" that means they get to use their ball to knock your ball off the court so you have to chase your ball down while they shoot. its
so my good little buddy hit my ball out four times. so it was time to turn the table. i grabbed my ball and bounced his ball high.

then KARMA

I hit his ball, it hit the rim of the hoop and bounced back and hit me in the face.
can you say fat lip. bloody nose and teary eyes.


Tuesday, February 21, 2006

the force

today one of my boys told me had "the force"
"look" he said
then he licked his hand and pushed it slowly at another girl. She, of course, leaned back to get away from "the hand" and he said.
" see. the force."
Man I love that kid.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

by request: Ring-Pop Boy

we had been dating for a while. the relationship had run it's course and I was preparing to end it. I had given it a weeks grace period but it was no help. we had a date that friday night. I would tell hm then. at the last minute he told me he had invited some friends to join us for dinner. SUPRISE. (never think that a control freak will like a suprise. we never do.)
So we went to dinner with the gang. Good Times.
Then we were to go to a movie. With the Gang. SUPRISE #2
I found a reason not to go.
(I think he thought I wanted to be alone with him. true. 'cause it was break up hour.)
Randomly we went to visit some more of his friends. (I think he was showing me off. FREAK)
Finaly we went to a park. (SUPRISE #3. my turn.) we talked a while and just as I opedned my mouth to tell him I needed some space he says I have something for you.
(Still SUPISE #3. not yet my turn i guess.)
He puts on some music.(Titanic)
He has me get out of the slow dance in the parking lot.(I don't dance)
We dance toward the back of the car and he opens the trunk.(Am I about to die?)
He pulls out some flowers.(Oh gee. I feel another suprise coming on.)
We dance.(I Don't Dance.)
He spins me out and I fall.( I DON'T DANCE MORON!)
He picks me up but he stays down. (says...........lots of words.)
He presents me with.......A Ring Pop!!!!??!?!?!
a ring pop.
yea buddy glad to know you were so sure of this that you went for the gold. glad to know you tried to learn stuff about ME so that when you asked ME to marry YOU, you'd be sure to present ideas That Would Appeal To All Those OTHER GIRLS You Dated BEFORE me.

Oh Ring Pop Boy. I can't marry you. For you do not know who I am. And you have done nothing to show me that you know or CARE about Who I Am. You see I'm not an ideal. I'm a person. An Individual if you will. And that seems to be a consept that has escaped you.
Thank you for this lovely hard cand and plastic. But there's a reason why DIMONDS are a girls best friend.
DIMONDS are forever. Hardened sugar will only last the night.

There it is Nessa. ENJOY!

Saturday, February 11, 2006


for six weeks i played an adict. i had to have chocolate at very turn. i fear that the adiction has lasted. all i can think about is it's rich tastey goodness. some of you saw the show. you might think why not miss the friendships or the audiances or for crin' out loud the lip action.
the story was about Ruth indeed. but the love affairs she had with Albert and Bill only come second to her love of chocolate. i think that is the one thing i will keep from the character.
Pear taught me to be kind to animals.
Hannigan taught me to love children
Ruth gave me a true love of the sweetness.

the only problem is now that i'm broke and there is no chocolate in my house.
Evil thy name is SNICKERS.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

a moment of trueth

i have a confession to make.
i heard my co actor sing on saturday....he sang a song from jekle & hyde. i knew he could sing. we all know he can sing. he's going to vegas to be n a gerat production of phantom. he's good right.

oh no my friends he's DAMN GOOD.

i'm not gunna lie. i cried a little. not sure why. but there i was sitting in a mostly empty theater. just chillin' with th cast. Allen conviced Ben to sing for us.

DAMN i cried. He's good.

Thursday, January 19, 2006


i need to find a way to bring up to the administrative staff that our weekly meetings are more useless then helpful. true as a new teacher for the first year it was quite helpful. but year after year the meetings don't change. i don't know how the teachers that have been there for years and years stand it. watching them durring the meeting is like waiting for a bomb to explode. Honestly sitting through this 30 min. meeting is not only patronizing but redundant and rediculous.
any body have an idea other then distruction on how to remedy this situation?

Sunday, January 08, 2006

the mullet mans better half

so most of you know the story of H's "mullet man"
a couple of weeks ago i met his brother or cousin or some kind of relative. the chld was not in his right mind.
the conversation frightened me as he gazed at me with one eye and the other spun wildly around in his head.
none of the conversation made sence. it was akward. it was weird. and it made me a better person for having survived it.
H, i hope to never have the full understanding of what you endured so long ago. but my dear i do in some small way feel your pain.


today my scriptures were found. i lost them in october. my joy is complete.

Happy Happy Happy me.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006


Today my little Dereck said while talking to another child "for Christmas we went to Salt Vegas."
He's my new favorite.